November 9, 2006

DEF LEPPARD guitarist Vivian Campbell ahs posted the following message on the band's official web site:

"Hello again, and my apologies for not writing more frequently. It seems that there's just not enough hours in the day to get done all the things that need be done. This is most likely due to the fact that I'm asleep most of the day. Well, I am a rock star after all.....or so I like to think.

"In fact, we pay people to remind us of this fact at several preassigned points during the day. Money well spent, I'd say! Take my monkey for example; Dave openly refers to me as 'his rock star'. It makes me most happy to hear his sycophantic cooings as he hands me a guitar that's only slightly out of tune (well, you pay peanuts, you get monkeys...right?). And Dave, as it happens, is the reason I'm writing this little blurb.

"First I was chastised by Shari, our most wonderful production girl, for not writing updates during the tour, and then Dave Wolff, my monkey, mentioned that he is currently loveless and thus in need of a girl who could perhaps share his fascination for anal fireworks. So, I guess that's really the bottom line — no pun intended; my monkey needs love.

"Any takers?"

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