GWAR Manager SLEAZY P. MARTINI Comes Out Of Retirement For 'Electile Dysfunction '08' Tour

GWAR upcoming tour, dubbed Electile Dysfunction, will feature the return of the group's manager, Sleazy P. Martini. Sleazy's announcement on the matter reads as follows:

"Greeting losers, it is I, the world's shrewdest man, Sleazy P. Martini, manager of GWAR, announcing an entertainment merger between GWAR, Mid-Galactic Wrestling and the 2008 Presidential Election in a craptacular mashup of a tour we have named 'Electile Dysfunction '08'. Due to popular demand, or cheap club owners that need to be 'Martinied,' after stiffing me last tour, I have personally come out of my semi-retirement of managing the entire porn industry to make sure that this will be the fairest and squarest test of American Presidential metal we can rig my way. Diebold can't stop the double dollop of degradation and destruction that Clinton and Obama will receive nightly at the hands of Oderus and Bone Snapper, or the torture that will see McCain mc-skinned as the candidates will be forced to prove their Presidential chops in the only arena that matters — the wrestling arena. Yes, all three candidates are on a fight card that also features Bozo Destructo and Sawborg Destructo, as the Desructo-Destucto Express, in a championship tag team match vs. GWAR that will determine Earth's future, for a couple of hours nightly. Yes, the American Presidency and the Mid-Galactic Wrestling belts are on the line, at your local Puko-Plex Organized Death Arena, and you dumb fucks will miss it — unless you steal your mom's credit card and get tickets now! It's politics decided by death sport, the kind of election America deserves. Also on the bill will be KINGDOM OF SORROW (featuring members of HATEBREED and CROWBAR) and Portland's thrash-lords TOXIC HOLOCAUST. Yeah, I own them, too!"

(Thanks: MidgetMassacre)