KORN singer Jonathan Davis has admitted that he finds it difficult to listen to the band's latest album, "The Nothing", because he lost both his mother and his estranged wife within the same time span leading up to the LP's recording sessions.
"Every KORN record is therapeutic for me," he told Kerrang! magazine. "It's like a chapter in my life. I can pull out any KORN record, listen to it and remember what I was going through emotionally at that time. It's my everything; it keeps me going, keeps me alive and helps the pain.
"I can't listen to ['The Nothing']," he said. "Every time I listen to it, I fucking start crying. I mean, it's difficult for me to perform the songs. It's fucking hard. But I do it because there are people out there who can relate."
Davis's wife Deven died in August 2018 at the age of 39 from the effects of mixing five drugs, including cocaine and heroin
The former girl-on-girl porn star reportedly suffered with sobriety and substance abuse throughout her life.
According to Jonathan, Deven also battled alcohol and a sex and gambling addiction.
In a statement released shortly after her death, Jonathan called Deven "an amazing wife, amazing mother and amazing friend" who was suffering from "a very serious mental illness."
After marrying Jonathan in 2004, Deven and the singer had two kids together, Pirate and Zeppelin. (Jonathan's first son from his previous marriage, Nathan, turned 24 this fall.)
KORN guitarist James "Munky" Shaffer told "Whiplash", the KLOS radio show hosted by Full Metal Jackie, that "it was not easy" trying to come up with fresh music for "The Nothing" knowing that it could be the basis for catharsis for Jonathan. "As anybody knows, and most people do, when you're dealing with grief and loss, you go through different phases, different stages — you can be angry one day and sad the next, and it could go on and on like that for months," he said. "So, actually, what he started out, what he wanted us to do was much heavier than anything we've ever done, and then that kind of changed when we started handing him some demos that me, Brian ['Head' Welch, guitar] and Ray [Luzier, drums] were working on. It started leaning towards more of a melodic thing. I think that's just kind of what resonated with him when it came time to write lyrics and stuff. So, it changed a little bit, but that's part of the creative process."
"The Nothing", KORN's 13th studio LP, came out earlier this year. The band will hit the road with BREAKING BENJAMIN in early 2020, starting on January 23 in Allentown, Pennsylvania.